Racial Empathy

I started this post a few months ago and am now getting back to it so I've added new content. Enjoy.

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Recently I attended a discussion on Race. Here are three points that I'd like to share.

History is rife with racism. Since the 2016 election, racism is back in the spotlight. While I did not grow up in the 1960s, I imagine that the feelings about racism have not changed much since then. In discussions about race or between races, ignoring the influence of local history can stall the conversations. As the same time, focusing on the past without a problem grounded in now and headed towards the future is unlikely to bring about effective change. These changes must come from both sides of the power differential. In every racial divide one side has greater power than the other. Those with lower power want to engage those with lower power in resolving the differences. This is a challenge. Those with lower power need to find common ground with those of higher power to affect change. Those with higher power need to suspend judgment long enough to hear and understand those with lower power.

As with many things in life, racism is not simple. People don't simply fall into one of two groups: racist, and non-racist. Helping people deal with problems of race is sometimes done with the right intentions and sometimes it keeps the lower power group in the position of lower power. Jokes can have the same unexpected impact. While a joke may sound funny to some groups, racial jokes can keep the higher power groups in the lead. Policies also have unexcpeted consequences. While excess political correctness and extreme caution in speech can be paralyzing, it is eye opening when you discover how a sensitive audience reacts to help, jokes, or policy that have race specific implications.

Who you are is not set in stone. Who you are and how people see you are both fluid and influenceable. Perhaps years have gone by and you are sure people see you a particular way. Maybe that's true. What if it's not? Accepting that you and others have limits, a colorful history, areas for improvement, and areas of excellence is all part of being human. However confident someone is, they have limits and baggage - just like everyone else. Of course, the opposite is also true. However low a person is in another person's eyes, they have their own areas of excellence. One of my favorite movies is Unbreakable. The idea is that for every person on one end of the super-hero spectrum, there is an equal and opposite super hero out there. The movie has fun psychology  - I've watched it several times.

Accepting others faults starts with accepting your own faults. The harder it is to accept your own faults, the harder it will be to accept faults in others. Accept your own faults. Acknowledge your own goodness. Acknowledge your own excellence. Accept that you have good things to bring the world and that others are not as bad as they seem.

Now I don't live in a bubble of super hero movies - while that might be fun. I accept that there are people who have issues that make them too challenging to be around. You can't fix everyone. I'm OK with that. But even though some people are broken beyond your ability to repair, if you find yourself generalizing the behavior of one person to all the people in their class, you might want to ask yourself why. Why is it essential to generalize one person's behavior to a broader class? Often, generalization is a strategy to simplify. Generalizing to simplify is a recipe for failure. While it may help in the near term, it will fail in the long term. Small specific problems are solvable. Large general problems often are not solvable.

Be open to your own areas for improvement. Be open to areas for improvement in others. Keep things simple. Keep things small. Make your world and the world around you better as you go.

It is clear to me that there is more to racial inequity than the shocking headlines. It is also clear to me that it is impossible to avoid some impact from every comment or action. I focus on having the right intention. While having the right intention won't always lead to right action, right intention is a good place to start. It is also OK to declare that a particular approach - be it help, or policy, or discussion - is not working. Stop, and try something else. Too often we push hard for a solution that will not land.

Moving on

This is a post I started month ago. I wonder if it still holds true. Here it is.

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Simplify, Simplify, Simplify.

If that were the motto of our president-elect, I could put aside most of his rhetoric. To rise above the fray and become a superstar in modern society, one must make some compromises. Each of the recent candidates made compromises both publicly and privately. Many of these required value judgements that do not align with my values. Unfortunately, when we can't pick all the personality traits of our presidential candidate, we must accept a few undesirable traits.

Whether I think the current president-elect was the better of the two candidates is no longer relevant. What matters now is how do we move forward. Here are some strategies.

1. Data has served me well in my life. Let's look for ways to keep data driven decision making in the foreground.
2. Simple incremental change has generated buy-in faster than broad sweeping change. Let's keep our eyes on distant goals - e.g. job availability, justice equality, and sustainable living - while focusing on immediate changes we can make today.
3. Simple systems out perform complex systems. Even the most complex systems only operate well when they can be broken down in to simple parts. Overly complex systems or policies become unwieldy fast.

All this comes down to simplicity. Note that my first comment is about data. Although simple systems and simple incremental steps are essential, data is the guide to the vision.